King of the Hill

I don't know how this post is going to turn out. It could be incredibly serious. It could be increasingly sarcastic. I don't even know what I'm going to write about.

Thoughts... I have a lot of them. I do a lot of thinking. A lot of thinking about some important things. A lot of thinking about nothing. Probably more thinking about nothing. This is unfortunate.

In my interactions with people, I probably strive to be more amiable. I hope to be funny and seek to be wanted. As I write this, I wonder if these thoughts should even be published for all to see. My more secret and personal of thoughts of course are recorded privately, away from technology. I guess I hope that my honesty and openness would speak to my reader. I often speak to be heard and repeat to be certain that someone is paying attention.

What use is that? What does that say about what I truly treasure? It's like a giant game of king of the hill with my heart.

Like everyone in this world, I am insecure. The odd thing is that when I am not thinking about myself, I am most secure. I worry. I try to control. I lie. All because I don't like who I am or I want things a certain way.  Who then is my god? It certainly isn't the one, true God. It is me. It is those around me. It is the very things that were created for me to enjoy.

There is nothing new under the sun. I am not the first to understand or think about these things. Because of that, I am a fool. So many of us know everything I am talking about. If I am vague, let me be clear.

Christians. We claim to follow the one, true God. Yet, we let other things in this life rule over us far before we let God take the wheel. Every action we perform is an outpouring of our heart and reflects who sits on its throne.

Every word that falls from my lips, every motion that my body performs, every instance that beckons my joy, reflects who or what reigns in my heart. Thank God for grace.

This might sound dumb, but Jesus knew what he was talking about with his response to the greatest commandment. Love the LORD your God with all of your heart, all of your mind, all of your soul, and all of your strength. The second is like it: love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend the whole law and prophets. All the things we try to do to be right with God don't matter. If we love Him with all that we have, I think everything else will follow. My insecurities will fade. My joy will be found. Maybe my thoughts will tend to have purpose too.

A Million Miles in a Thousand Years

What story are you telling? from Rhetorik Creative on Vimeo.

http://www.amazon.com/Million-Miles-Thousand-Years-Learned/dp/1400202981/ref=tmm_pap_title_0?ie=UTF8&qid=1276717752&sr=1-1

Blah.... blah... the one?... the one!?!!?... screwed that one up...

An issue that has been on my mind lately. I actually had a great conversation tonight that shed some light on some of my flawed thinking. While not ready (and probably not a surprise), I would like to get married one day.

gasp

I know... shocker. I'm not ready, and I know this. However, I write to share the insight, not my bleeding heart. One thing I've definitely learned is to stop worrying about finding "the one" and worry about becoming the one God created you to be. Blah... blah... blah... Great knowledge and you should hold onto it. But here is the insight:

Sometimes in our lives we come across people, and they enter in the most random of ways. As we begin to learn about them, a thought may enter our mind: "hey, they're really cool." Since they happen to be the opposite sex and you're looking for "the one", (consciously or subconsciously... it doesn't matter... you're probably doing it! If I could point a finger at you and accuse you of it, I would. Try to imagine the most intense and slightly awkward accusation finger point.) the thought crosses your mind: "perhaps, this is the one I've been searching for all my life!"

insert thought bubble with you floating and hearts all around you

False! That is a trashy form of logic. Think about your best friend. Is the way your friendship began how you would think of meeting someone who would be in your life for a long time? That was a weird long sentence. But seriously, did you think in that moment you would have a life-long friendship? Or maybe you have a friend of the opposite sex that life is great with. Why do you think it has worked so well? Did you ask yourself if you would marry them after knowing them for a couple weeks? If you did and you're still great friends, please stop reading... I want to be right about something. Why should we look at someone that we met in a very obscure or seemingly random way and place them into the category of potential predestined relationships.

Pick-up line: Do you believe in predestination? You do? That's awesome because I believe that we are predestined to be with each other!

Hopefully you'll get slapped. I pray you get slapped. Maybe I shouldn't pray that, but it should happen. I hope my point is clear though. If we're concerned with becoming "the one," I'm not so sure we should care whether or not someone falls into the category of my wife. Perhaps, when we get to where we need to be in God, we will find a partner at that conjunction. Perhaps, there won't be anyone there, but when we are where we need to be in God, it shouldn't be a problem, right?

I know... with my massive audience, this is going to break the sound barrier and stuff.

My Propitiation

I fed the hungry
I helped the poor
I sought out the unwanted
I remembered the widow, cured the sick, cared for the broken
I spoke truth, rebuked the religious, and waited on the unfaithful
I defended the helpless, fathered the fatherless, and calmed the restless
I freed captives, clothed the naked, and refused to be silent
I met all needs; I loved all people

I became the cheat, the thief, the gossip
I became the murderer, the adulterer, and the glutton
The rapist, the molester, the pimp
Condemnation, manipulation, and torture
I became greed, pride, and wrath
The liar, the drunk, and the fake
I overlooked the starving, ignored the broken, and withheld from the poor
I spat on my brother, cursed my mother, and betrayed my wife
I became the vain, the complacent, the apathetic
The lazy, the sarcastic, and the addict

I became sin, your sin
Though I knew no sin
I became this for you
I was beaten, crucified, buried, and I rose again
For the glory of my Father
Who calls you His beloved
You are my beloved
I am Jesus, the Christ

The Butterfly Effect

The other night, one of my best friends and I were talking about how some of the smallest decisions that people make can end up making a huge impact later in life. For instance, I would not be at my current college if I had chosen to write an optional essay. While it is due to laziness, I wouldn't want to be anywhere else. These past couple months have been a huge time of learning for me. Much of my lessons are due to those I have met here at school. Had I not worked a D-Now in Jasper, I wouldn't have been offered an intern position for that Summer. Had I not taken that position, I wouldn't have watched "The House Bunny." Because of "The House Bunny," I felt the desire to look into joining a Christian frat. I know it may sound crazy or dumb, but I really did have this revelation. Even deciding to eat lunch at the Starbucks on campus had an impact on my current thought process. I probably wouldn't have gone to Passion amongst other things.

I think you could even take this thought to a more minor level. The whole idea of the butterfly effect really is a massive thing. Whenever I decide to wake up effects what I do for the rest of the day. That in turn has its repercussions on others. They have to deal with my presence in some manner.

This is no longer a profound thought, but it is rather a profound enjoyment. It almost gives a great sense of purpose (about to pull the Jesus juke). I think that, maybe, I need to be more concerned with whether or not God is glorified in my actions regardless of how small it is. However, where I am sitting right now, I'm thinking that I should find pleasure in this idea. I'm starting to lose my grip on the thought, but each instance in my life effects the next and the billions following. I think I should be more aware of this, and I should also be more concerned with who it is I am seeking to please in my decisions.

I know that my crowd base is next to nothing, but if anyone has any thoughts, I welcome them. Maybe I should start making drafts of my blogs too for the benefit of clarity and other good things.